He's Back And He's Schmucktacular!
@SchmuckOnAHorse
Mild-mannered CPA by day, miserable curmudgeon by night. Followed by @mrsdash.
ID:790005152052834304
https://twitter.com/search?q=from:SchmuckOnAHorse%20-filter:replies 23-10-2016 01:41:20
106,3K Tweets
7,1K Followers
5,3K Following
Midge
@mxmclain
Relentless architect of my own hell, curator of seasonal profanities, cultural symbol
Jason, ex Inferis
@benedictsred
Not A. Doctor, M.D.
SneezingWithWetMascara
@WetMascara
Yes, THAT Thanksgiving tweet. My Faves: https://t.co/90HdOEinlH Recent Tweets in Link Below.
.:RiotGrlErin:.
@RiotGrlErin
• goth daria vibes • fear does not exist in this bio • muppet enthusiast • reba/dolly 2024 • subscribe •
La Femme Fatali
@toomanycommas3
I'm a niche genre.
Real Life Mommy
@reallifemommy3
Twitter is cheaper than therapy. Tweets are mine 👀@huffpost @TODAY_Parents @buzzfeed @babycenter @chicagotribune @boredpanda @thepoke @thechive ...
PieGuy
@ilovepie84
My wife works two jobs so that I can chase my dream of being in a boy band. https://t.co/JhWCxIXYbK
jokey lil jokester making my lil jokey jokes
@EdgarPoop1
I’m just joking
nice things I say to myself
@meantomyself
She may not look like much but she can catch a man, said someone trying to insult me. Not funny or young enough to write tweets for Clorox. avi @popartcartoonz
mom mom mom mom mom
@notmythirdrodeo
https://t.co/lKTwNPcAGY @momsoverhere on IG. Mommin’ the best I can with low standards. Featured in @HuffPost, @Buzzfeed, @Today_Parents and more.
Mad Hatter Mommy!!!
@MadHatterMommy
sometimes funny, full of cheese, chocolate and unpopular opinions; don’t DM please https://t.co/IdtiajUsnd
💀SpookyLittleComic👻
@CunniLinguist77
failed librarian🖤💀🫀🎃avid mourner🪦🥀⚰️enthusiastic weeper•town crier•inward groaner•proud oddity🎭🎨📚animal cruelty≠joke🫥🗿🏰🌧🌳🍕🍪🪻🪺🪷🦦🫧NoDMs🏳️🌈
Village Person
@SvnSxty
If you support ethnic cleansing, kindly fuck off 😊 Find me and follow me @SvnSxty on all platforms. my tweets ⤵️
Saint Vivica, Patron Saint of Turkeys 🦃🦃
@QueenVofCoffee
DM Room cheerleader & typo goddess. 56% funny. TH: @Conchvegas1 . Avi by ToonMe. Header: @dimplesticks. https://t.co/dRgjRopfud
A Dad Influence
@gbergan
Most of my followers are bots. You're probably not even real. My incessant ramblins in the link below ⬇️
The Ciscokidder
@TheCiscoKidder
99% jokes, 100% Stay home dad, atheist, BLM, feminist, pro LGBTQ+ and left af. https://t.co/HpCbHaktUa
President Warren G. Harding (Zero Indictments)
@PopeAwesomeXIII
Commercially Inviable. ✌️ 29th US President (1921-1923) 🧐 Tip jar! https://t.co/Igf16XkzWv ❤ He/Him 👍 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🏴☠️ ❤️ See pinned for migration info
ADHDean
@ADHDeanASL
BLACK LIVES MATTER. Husband, dad, friend. Ally. ASL Interpreter. Doofus. Midvale School for the Gifted alum. Mastodon: [email protected]
NurseBrianRN
@rn_murse
Singer-Songscreamer I Gay Homosexual I Pubic Figure | Fourth Thing
Blue Berrymore
@BerrymoreBlue
Sarcasm and Anxiety. I love dad jokes and mom bods.
Jane Says...
@CrisisLined
On a certain level, this is therapy. Mental Health trains of thought vary… I write to keep the moments, and to let them go. Dreaming is my default setting.
🦋★·.·´Ana`·.·★🦋
@fairy20209
✿𝐼 𝓁𝑒𝒶𝓇𝓃𝑒𝒹 𝒻𝓇𝑜𝓂 𝓂𝓎 𝓅𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝓅𝓇𝑒𝓈𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓌𝒽𝒾𝓁𝑒 𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓃𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓂𝓎 𝒻𝓊𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒.✿ A+A=💙 $lopez121213
MeIissa Lastname 🐝
@M3lissaLastname
Wears bright-colored socks. Accepting of everyone. Severe weather enthusiast. 🌩️ Follow me here, not in real life.
Jaime
@JamSt1977
Host of @eroticismfan @kinkprompt @FairytaleErotic @Italian_Verse @15WordPoet @Only8Words @GeoPoetry24 @PropelPrompts @LifeInColour23
lissy
@xanaxxcereal
i am not a twitter sex bot.
Sodapop Stardust
@sodapopstardust
Never let anyone know what you're truly capable of. Being underestimated gives you a tremendous advantage. Having knowledge does not excuse you from hard work.
Hellish Jay
@ThaRealJRob
Hellish Jay From Ellijay/They must have amnesia/They forgot that I’m him/Garfield enjoyer/I’ve been called “The Creighton Duke of getting fucked up”
𝚓𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚜
@JurassicJells
a stupid girl ⚾️ #GoHalos
Naïve American
@nahdude83
Life is a highway and there certainly are a lot of wrong-way drivers.
poetry
@verseweave
when life shackles, i turn to intoxication. in art, in beauty, in ecstasy, in poetry.
HunnyHiive
@HunnyHiive
Tasks of Parenting is WILD FYI you're not alone on the journey.
KSHE95
@wednesday0525
Marine Corps Veteran Living in Japan.
Melanie
@MelaniePoupou
In orbit always. https://t.co/RpiOCPg8j7
Melanie
@MelsAlterEgo
A kiss is a conversation without words. Let's see how you talk to me.
Redheads have more fun
@Nicebutcrazyred
Big fan of tequila, laughter and sleep. Bi wife to one amazing husband. Living life one day at a time. Olympic eyeroller. 🙄 Don't be an asshole.😈😘🌈
Steve V and 75 others
@Steve_Van_Hagen
But whosoever shall say, Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. - Mt 5:22
Aunt Large Marge
@AuntTsunami
I love drama, just not my own. I like to put my foot in my mouth (not literally). No DM’s.
Will Carter
@WillCarSM74
⚡🪓Parare Semper Inopinatum 🪓 ⚡
Harry’s🔥Hotpants🫶🏿
@hotttttotrot
𝕏 Make your life SPECTACULAR! Joie Vivre SHARP!🚫CALL/DM! 💯Real Curiousity & Integrity & Love 🇦🇺🦄Truth&Free Speech. Be Courage. Be Light in The Dark Dork
𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑫𝒂𝒓𝒌 𝑵𝒆𝒓𝒅𝒚 𝑴𝒂𝒎𝒂 🖤
@mysterynips3000
Oh hi!💋I'm fkn dark, twisted & full of inappropriate thoughts🦋mental health ( • ) ( • ) I love horror!! 🖤 Prob eating garlic bread! Fetch is fetch AF!🧚♀️
temple runner
@ponderingssss
geet said that????
yer mom. 🤨
@mersadaisy
Wife. Mom. Usually tired. Perpetually skeptical. #Spartan by blood; #Tarheel by marriage. ⚾️🚲💚📚 #bikedc #HandsOffDC #k1p2
JB 💓
@cornfedh0e
LEO wife, former detention officer, current mama of a boy & two dogs. silly goose.
Troy Metheny
@TroyCMetheny
NotTheDadBodYou'reLookingFor
@DadBodLife69
Just a dad, trying to hold it together, raising some kiddos. Friendly, chatty, always open for some conversation. I won't bite, unless you ask me too ! #dadbod
redyellowgreendance 💃🏻
@RYGdance
Mom to two hilariously quotable boys. Link to my tweets: https://t.co/fEivqY0S59
sister golden hair surprise
@notbetty4ever
Student of human nature, cats, rocks. Advocate for Seniors. Hopeful🌻beyond reason. 🔎 Words Wisdom Wit ♻
♡ Eve ♡
@evecullen610
gently, touch me with your words (my tweets...my words)© •she/her• #oneforever
🥁The Lonely Side of Town🎸
@S00n3r_B0rn
Lover of music. NSFW. I’m as comfortable as your favorite sweater on a cold, dreary morning, except more flattering. Percussive Dweeb. Drop in and sit a spell.
SweetK🌻
@SweetOzzychic
I come in peace ✌️ and Vegemite Sweets🇦🇺🍡🍭
Funny Snarky Humor
@FUNNYsnarkyJOKE
I like 2 make light of things 2 brighten up a dark world. #funny #humor #satire #snarky #memes #humour #hilarious
Matthew Dangerously
@pulcher_primus
former US Navy FMF Hospital Corpsman ¤ Iraq Veteran ¤ Electromagnetic Field Operation Service Technician ¤ Iraq War Journal at link below
She Ginger
@Sheginger
Pale as Wonder Bread. Laughter IS the best medicine! Writes stuff. https://t.co/MCQmU7lU88
Jim
@baleguy
Just watching the good, the bad and the ugly from my little corner of the planet. No DM'S Married.
Sitaram Solutions
@Remote_149
Sitaram Solutions is a digital marketing company, we can provide you every type of service Related to Social Media :Around the World Staytune
ColleensDragon
@ColleensDragon
Married 💍, Whovian, owned by rescue cat, #DnD #DDPY #Resist It gets weird around here. You have been warned!
𝗱𝗿𝗼𝗷𝗼🌴
@neonsmilebomb
日本語は話せません
Crusty 🪥🧻🥦
@SmokedMullett
⭐🦮🥇Brush your teeth, wipe your butt and eat your vegetables. https://t.co/bTwvhpwFVm
Ointmental
@Ointmental
'Cartoon, Camera, Caffeine' freak with an awesome hental mealth. I may be older, but I am certainly not wiser. Don't believe a word I say unless you want to 😾
Dreamboat Dave 🚢
@TurnLeftElise
Riding the M6, waiting for you... Thoughtful fragments... ...
THEE DiscoWitch 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇺🇦🌻
@gothicdisco
Expat New Englander. Book, horror, history nerd. Tie-dyed glitter goth witch with a sense of humour blacker than my clothes. She/her. #KHive #NAFO
Cady Miller
@cady_miller
Pussywillowdottie
@thsisbsitstinks
Perpetually pissed off...everywhere I look I see a problem. It's true, I am a bitchologist and I hate goodbyes😭. Not so nice jew-ish girl..🤷🏻♀️
Pleasant Wolf
@futwolfhardware
Seen my cows? .https://t.co/6vjkZCFMnH
Ron B.
@Apologia315
Father of six and happily married and an entrepreneur. Former Christian hater and non-believer. Used critical thinking and reason to discover the truth.
ΔŇǤ€Ł ₣ΔŁŁ
@Angels_fall5
I write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect. ————————————— don't play follow unfollow with me.. I am the kindest rude you've ever seen.
Marie
@marie50130023
Le monde est beau
Short For TERRIFIC
@Witkicker
Can be blunt Can be sharp Prone to whimsy
JoeCeePhus
@jayceepee
Hoping not to outlive civilization. Good lefty (politics and dexterity). 50. Loungewear influencer. Terran exceptionalist.
Psychotic Potato 🍄
@DenisTypeI
A day at a time...🙏 #Progressive #Agnostic #JDA #Diabetes #HeartHealth #transfriendly #StonerFam #fungi #mushrooms #MmemberVille 💨💨