Me in the drive thru: Let me get a uuhhhh

I reference episodes of SpongeBob, like a Monk quoting ancient proverbs to people seeking spiritual guidance

Please Mr Bull, not right now, we have a lot going on

White people see a opp and be like "we've got company"

Doom scrolling? I’m joy scrolling, knowledge scrolling, giggle scrolling.

sorry i didn’t text you back i have writers block

the dog just waiting there patiently, not saying anything

I feel like she’s a few months away from turning into the green M&M

this is how it feels to be alive right now

when my beautiful friend becomes single i shall run the conclave for her next bf

this, 7 beers, sad country songs, and asking am i stripes or solids before every shot

ㅤ

romo (relief of missing out)

bad weekend to be a hot dog

I’m so happy love island over y’all could finally shut the fuck up

4 sneezes in a row is clout chasing. wrap it up