“Mail me my check.”

I’ve had mangoes that were better than entire years of my life

When I worked front desk at a studio A$AP came in and I didn't realize who he was so I asked him to sign in on the sheet and he said "A$AP?" and I said "yes now if you wouldn't mind" and he smiled and didn't make fun of me so yes he'll be a great dad

why is there so much shrimp-themed drama on the bachelor. I like shrimp :/

Clayton’s trying so hard not to laugh about shrimp drama

Haven’t taken off the paint for 3 weeks now!! #TheBachelor

How long was 50 Cent hanging like that just waiting

always improve. always be better

hey sorry i acted weird the other day i was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired

after i say “that’s crazy” twice please wrap up your story

Literaleigh is a beautiful name for a girl ❤️

People who forget to eat are amazing to me. I miss one meal and I’m burning bridges with immediate family members. I miss two that’s organ failure, total body and mind shutdown by the end of one calendar day

If you sleep less than 7 hours a night, read this:

When I say “heheheh” this is what I mean

Yes life is hard now but in the early 2000s your coworkers could secretly nominate you for What Not to Wear.

Somebody took this baby’s father away from her today because they disagreed with his politics. Absolutely fucking evil.