Lemme clear it up for you. Sci-fi is when your currency is called credits, and fantasy is when it's called coin.

At Waffle House & the chick was talking to a coworker when I hear “That really ain’t my problem so I’m just gonna go over here, make grits and mind my own business” 😂😂😂

oh great everybody online made up these people called “The try guys” and they’re all pretending theyve known about them forever in order to trick me

Ok I knew what an Adam Levine was. Even knew what a Harry Styles was. I have no idea wtf a Ned from Try Guys is & I will take no steps in fixing that. Pls do not attempt to inform me either. I followed two (2) white ppl scandals this month. Thats enough. We'll try again October

Just got directed to talk to someone with the instructions “she’s got dark hair and always has a great tan” The woman is clearly Filipino This poor woman working with a bunch of old rich white men who just think she conveniently manages to “always have a great tan” 🙄😂

I don’t know what local weather channel needs to hear this, but we don’t actually need to see the weather guy swept out to sea on live television to understand that there’s a hurricane outside

marjorie taylor greene, who voted against gay marriage two months ago because it’s a sin, is now getting divorced from her husband after cheating on him with the manager of her gym

The wonderful thing about learning Gaelic is that you start to truly understand the deep, sacred knowledge that's carried in the true names of Scotland's places. Grey hill. Big hill. Big grey hill.

Instead of saying "Women slept their way to the top”, we say "Men withhold promotions until they receive sexual favors". Because that is what it really is.

im a small government conservative and i am demanding detailed information about your childs menstrual cycle if they want to play high school sports

I’m wearing a brown sweater & burgundy leggings walking around Staples with my keys & wallet in my hand and a lady really just stopped me to ask if I worked at here….. like really lady??

I deeply wish I thought this guy was cute because this is an absolutely phenomenal answer 😂

AITA posts with titles like "AITA for poisoning my entire family" will be stories about someone who behaved in a totally reasonable, justified manner, while "AITA for cooking my wife her favorite dinner" will be the most chilling tale of sociopathy you've ever read.

I'm alive you guys! I just had to take a little twitter break because it was getting kind of dark on here. But I'm still around!