‍  𝗘𝗫𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗖𝗘:𝘑𝘈𝘗𝘈𝘕, 𝘊𝘏𝘐𝘕𝘈, 𝘈𝘍𝘎𝘈𝘕𝘐𝘚𝘛𝘈𝘕, 𝘚𝘖𝘜𝘛𝘏 𝘚𝘜𝘋𝘈𝘕  ‍  𝘔𝘶𝘵𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝙁𝙐𝘾𝙆 𝙎𝙡𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙖 𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚𝙧𝙖 𝙢𝙖𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙪𝙧𝙥𝙡𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙞𝙧 𝙜𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙡𝙞𝙣 𝙖𝙩 0$ 𝙖𝙣 𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢 𝙁𝙐𝘾𝙆𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘫𝘰𝘣...

Do you think I’m some dog?

Well hello to you too, Miss Nicole. It’s truly an honor supporting you and your fan base. Heh— count yourself verified and if you need anything, I’ll be more than happy to satisfy.

“Which one of you are stealing my precious tweets? Can’t you see they are mindless without a proper user.” He holds up one of the birds. “This one is literally named, SHEEEEEEEEESH…!!”

👀

💬 someone complains about Twitter: me: remembers i am twitter

“What if I just… cringe?”

“These streamers are getting rather popular… twitch and YouTube might have an upper hand here… Perhaps I should expand on the Twitter Live feature.”

#NewProfilePic

⚠️𝑻𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒖𝒑𝒅𝒂𝒕𝒆: 𝑻𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑺𝒆𝒓𝒗𝒊𝒄𝒆𝒔 Twitter has updated his terms and services. All users within 500 followers or more must accept daily doses of dick and balls, willingly provided by the app. Do you accept these terms? [yes] [No]

“A much needed one. Browsers don’t have users to satisfy on the regular. Social media is always expanding. This is a big improvement, I promise.” He nodded trying to sound confident and smart.

Then I’m afraid cancellation is the only way.

“Who’s to say… but you as a browser should know, you store more porn than me and tumblr combined. Well… back when tumblr wasn’t a prude.” She would, but it wasn’t all bad. He always did prefer Firefox. Chrome and google always seemed so high maintenance. He’ll promise cuddles.

“TOS TIME! Everyone line up for your daily dose of dick.”

Is that so? 🤔

Hey you, give up your rights.

Someone understands the TOS.

“Not surprised. You’ve always been one to pack heat.”

Click! “That’s a tweet~”

⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ wake up . . need titty . . ⠀ ⠀