My piss is really yellow.

"Hello" "Hello" "Fuck me" "Okay"

I was literally one second away from having a wet dream. Thank fuck for turian reflexes.

RT Citadel Council PR: #Worst3WordPickUpLines We'll bang, okay? That's originality right there, folks.

Fuck my balls are itchy.

My cum is yum.

I just had a throw up burp.

"BestFlirtyTweet: Bro, when a girl says, "I'm done," sometimes it really means, "Fight for me."" Then cryptic bitch gets dumped. HAH!

That awkward moment when someone tweets about needing a Valentine and nobody gives a shit.

The moment in the shower when you fart and the water running down your back causes your ass to blow a bubble.

My penis is sticking out of my boxers.

International Women's Day? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Just took a ghost poop.

Would you kindly shut the fuck up, you no-life loser

Enough with the wet dreams ffs

My penis stings.

Just blew a bubble with my phlegm.

My left testicle is slightly bigger than the right one.

I HAVE FOUND MY SPIRIT ANIMAL. TMI Turian

So I finally bought Skyrim.