last game of the season playing on a stomach flu, 4-0, clean sheet, briefly subbed off to go throw up second half one assist, job done

true love graced you with its presence and you turned its intimacy to spectacle. for shame.

do you ever get the feeling you're being watched?

i am errr, how you say, insufferable

I'm so sorry Jenny I'm not a mature gentleman's male, I'm nobody's male :(

the rising ape lifts all ships

oh by gawd that's karl marx's music

They used to be 'the guy who organises functions for the group' but now the youth have a bold new name for this figure, they're a pleasing time commissioner

[wearing Stasi officer uniform, reclining in chair across from male mutual] at 7:09 pm you were followed by this female lowbie [i slide her pfp across the table] You immediately followed back. She only posts things like 'in my going for a walk era.' Can you explain yourself?

(when a girl replies to my viral tweet @­ing in her boyfriend) getting some real challengers vibes from this

Always get worried when I see a “thieves operate here” sign. Who is letting thieves do surgery?

not the biggest faith in my local candidates so had no choice but to spoil my ballot, had no idea democracy could fling you into this much credit card debt

i work hard to make this alternative house an alternative home

macbeth:

🏆 Alf Bosley cup trophy - secured ✔️

Now onto tomorrow! 🌹

Canvassing completed ✔️🌹

Leaflets delivered ✔️🌹

And now at the scene for tonight's cup final - Easton Cowboys v Filton Athletic.

COME ON EASTON!!! 🤠🤠🤠

um yeah you could say i have plans this evening

I hear your man got charmed away by the -