Kurt Vonnegut tells his wife he’s going to buy a single envelope and his explanation sums up the current state of the world.

Kenneth Branagh making a Poirot movie every year that no one particularly likes, but no one hates either, just quietly blends in the release schedule, really is the closest thing we have to a filmmaker with the George Costanza Mindset

A Management Consultancy is given £19.5m to tell schools how to save money teaching children with SEND. The firm's website boasts 0 experience in Education but the DfE has tasked it with reducing EHCPs by 20%. Just when you think you've seen everything... theguardian.com/uk-news/2023/s…

🚨GIVEAWAY ALERT🚨 We're giving away five limited edition proof boxes of THE NIGHT HOUSE by Jo Nesbo. To win all you need to do is: 🔁Retweet this tweet Winner will be announced Tuesday 19 September. UK only, T&Cs below. Also available for pre-order: penguin.co.uk/books/453212/t…

Guys my crocs were squeaking so much on the floor of the toilet at the pub that someone in a cubicle said ‘is that SpongeBob out there!!’

love how david lynch was sincerely asked if he would ever work with russell brand and he instantly said no right in front of him

These two graphs are not correlated by chance. In January 2013, the Daily Mail posted 6 articles about transgender issues. None of them were negative. In January 2023, they posted 115. And out of those, 87% were categorised as negative. In 2018, 1,700 anti-trans hate crimes

I really enjoyed blatant Se7en knock-off, Resurrection (1999), but the way Christopher Lambert loses his kid is very funny.

I’m dead 😂⚰️

"Roots of Happiness" is a gorgeous new book for younger readers by Susie Dent. It's published this week. Now, here's the thing. Susie & I are meeting up in October and Susie will SIGN & PERSONALISE copies of the books just for you! ORDER HERE. biggreenbookshop.com/signed-copies/…

Excellent meal @kala_manchester tonight. Wow. From start to finish. Great food. Thank you 😋👌🏻

The wicked witch of the west With a mouth flecked with foam Summons a hurricane of hate There's no place like home

Are you a man or a woman? Sorry, only 63 year olds are allowed to smoke. Yeah, just another nine hours til we're in Manchester.

Turns out that going in to a career in I.T after watching the 1995 film hackers was a mistake. Less edgy underground Angelina Jolie cyberpunks and more middle aged fat balding men saying 'Fucks sake' 10 times an hour, myself included. We don't even get a cool den to hang out in.

in high school my friend and I interviewed the cast of Percy Jackson & The Lightning Thief for our school newspaper but one of the guys had his eyes closed in the only picture we got so I googled him and photoshopped his eyes back on and then we published it

too many of you are fine with asking your new gfs parents for an entire box of fish fingers plus two more. Can’t believe the amount of puffins in my mentions