Greeting, Westeros.

@GregorPartyDude *turns red* You said you wouldn't speak about /that/ night. >.<

Now Prince Tommen wants to eat jelly beans. With mustard.

Seriously, why couldn't I have been sent to Dorne instead of Arys? He gets dornish hoes and I get Tommen's marshmallows.

#MyLastWordsBeforeIDie "Fuck... the... king..." I'm not sure where I heard it, but it's a pretty cool line.

#YourTextGotIgnoredBecause I won't reply to something I don't understand. What does 'butter his muffin' mean anyway? >> Ser Meryn BroGuard

They call me 'Boros the Belly'. How very original and thoughtful.

I hope that the cook in the Red Keep gets herpes.

#ImReallyGoodAt Fighting and swordplay. Yeah, sure, why not make me a food taster?

#WhatILearntInTheKingsguard Some knights should not be allowed to get near little children. #cough Ser Meryn BroGuard

#HowToPissOffAFemale Surrender without a fight when attackted by the Imp's men while escorting Prince Tommen. #TrueStoryBro

#DescribeYourCrushInOneWord Ros #wat