This is embarrassing for me but i'm struggling hard guys. Please RT if u could. We need help. Twitter keeps my humor going. i will not keep reposting this so dont worry about spam. gofundme.com/f/aly039s-canc…

My bra is a black hole. If you take it off mid-sex there's no telling what will hit you in the face. My debit card, kleenex, cookie crumbs, a hot wheels car...

Titles Featuring Lesbians Joyfully Existing And Also It’s Christmas Can We Just Let People Love Who They Love 🎥 Let It Snow 📺 Merry Happy Whatever

"The Hallmark Channel’s decision to remove LGBTQ families in such a blatant way is discriminatory and especially hypocritical coming from a network that claims to present family programming” Sarah Kate Ellis #BoycottHallmark hollywoodreporter.com/news/zola-pull…

4: Dad can I play on the roof?? Me: No 4: Oh not til I'm 5?? Me: Yeah definitely when you're 5 He will have forgotten this by October right???

Interesting... I heard the same thing on Oprah last week.

5 yr old: Hey Mom Me: Don’t day that again. 5yr old: Hey mama? Me: Yes dear...

What the hell kids- it’s 6:25am and mom is the only one up... ITS CHRISTMAS! I spent way to much time, love & stress over these presents! Get up and appreciate them!

Who's happy it's FRIDAY???

Easiest breakfast or snack option!!!! @VeggiesMadeGreat Superfood Veggie Cakes are now available at Walmart! Try them for breakfast, snack or a side dish #SuperfoodVeggieCakesatWalmart #ad veggiesmadegreat.com/?utm_source=Su…

There is an active situation at our Milwaukee facility and we are working closely with the Milwaukee Police Department. Our top priority is our employees and we’ll provide updates in conjunction with the police as we are able.

I saw a Karen buying four family-sized toilet papers at the grocery store, and the lady checking her out said, "Why so many?" And she laughed and said I don't know, everyone's doing it. And this kids, is why we say no to drugs.

Girl Scout cookies pair well with anxiety at 3 am. See you tonight for the Anxiety Woke Me Up Club? BYOC because I stress ate my way through a good portion of the cookie reserves.

No truer words

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Sign up & share the Veggies Made Great Community! Win prizes, sample products & more! #brandambassador #VeggiesMadeGreat #ad …adegreatcommunity.socialmedialink.com/?utm_source=So…

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Dave Chappelle represents a segment of society (along with white supremacists, hoteps, incels, and others) that is anxious about the waning power of cisheteronormativity and the patriarchy. 🧵

Rihanna pregs?!? #yasmama #Rihanna