how it feels to wear a hat as somebody who doesn’t wear hats

ima just sit back and count my money tbh im just on my own shit i dont concern myself with externalities

I went to broke asf with no motion Island and they had a statue of you in the town square dude

I love you megan thee stallion

(Looking at my hands in disbelief even though nothing is happening) What is going on?

ist es over für die katze ?

yo momma so fat, when she wanted a hot meal, she ate the sun! but never sated, she now stalks this dark earth in search of another flame... [a terrible keen rips through the night] silence! she approaches. douse that fire quick and we may yet live! your dad is also pretty fat

I have spoken aloud exactly once. My words became known as "Dullard's Remark"

Instead of saying "This you?" and posting an embarrassing screenshot of my opponent, I win Internet arguments by saying "This me?" and posting a nice photo of my handsome self.

Beautiful name for a Beautiful girl...

TV screens should be one big monochromatic pixel that changes colour based on the emotional subtext of a scene

over 10 years ago and i still say “bames nonds having a stronk” anytime i mess up a work when talking

Memorial Day

This is actually just a deer whose head evolved

gf: what's wrong? You've been kinda quiet all night me: you never make the clutch move of ordering a pizza at 1am

two wild horses seemingly floating down river majestic surfing pair possibly traveling on raft together

yeah, well, not according to my warped perception of reality

this fleeting ass moment...