Me and this big dick just chilling on the couch lol hope nobody comes down the chimney that would be random

one thing americans got right is the english language. it literally just makes the most sense, i can't even understand other languages at all

Me [at the last supper]: I'm sure gonna miss these suppers

Although I’m a jock I secretly enjoy sensitive music like phoebe bridgers

If the purge happened the only illegal thing I’d do is stay in the gym longer and grind harder

I think im addicted to keeping my eyes on my own paper and stacking in silence

Nice high beams brother! you ever had a gun pulled on you at 5:45 am?

This whole "no smoking with kids in the vehicle" thing is ridiculous.. look at him he's just cold...

by the time you realize my worth i’m gonna be drinking josh with someone else

this is how dudes act when they run out of beer

2000’s Nat Geo Tee

bro you lowkey light up my world like nobody else

They never seen a white boy make a medium amount of money like this

sydney sweeney do you fw dudes that make 17 an hour

She bouncing on it with the expressed written consent of Major League Baseball

I’d vote for every girl in the world if I could

i wouldve done this at 23 and 26 if i wanted to but i was lowkey on some other shit

Happy Thanksgiving to all--even the haters and losers!