“Overwatch” this, “Talon” that. Who cares.

I’m automatically withdrawing $100 from every person I encounter’s account. Happy pride.

At the end of the day, we’re all just a collection of randomly assembled intrusive thoughts in a metal husk, and I think that’s beautiful.

Hey, what the fuck is going on in Hanamura.

Haha prove it.

“Hack” this, “hack” that, whatever. Anyone can do it these days. Watch how miserable I can make a bunch of men playing RuneScape in the span of 5 minutes.

Just watched an OR throw a javelin at someone's Tesla for running a traffic light. I love Numbani.

Sorry, I'm no longer taking work from the Russian government. Someone has to stay home and feed the dogs, and do you have any idea how expensive petsitters are in Numbani?

Anyway.

It’s impolite to solve a captcha in front of an omnic.

I’ve been here too long. #MyTwitterAnniversary

I’m not a “shut-in”, I just can’t leave the house this time of year because the weather wreaks havoc on my allergies.

It only took five years but they finally fixed the airport.