Going to the organic grocer with my mom to pick up some “free range tomatoes”

Just tracked dog dookie into my apartment. Well, guess that’s the end of me.

Just witnessed a man drop about half a cheese string on the floor on the way into the building where I work and say to himself, in the smallest and saddest of voices, “Oh no, me cheese.”

Tip of the hat to the WestJet boarding agent crushing a Pep N’ Ched at 8 A.M.

We put our heart(s) and soul into this

My employer is forcing me to wear gape gloves to work

sour patch children

Epstein rules!

Moms love fries

the thing I miss most about movie theaters is overhearing someone say the dumbest fucking thing i’ve ever heard before the previews start

me when i Iisten to Blink 182 with another person

LMAOOO IM NEVER DELETING THIS APP

Pretty sure Haley Joel Osment is in my friends Bumble queue

prescription 2020 New Year’s Eve glasses

ACAB except for when it’s the third beach drum circle

Willy Wonka and the Charlie Factory

For Those About to Nut (We Salute You)