my moms hot take on the teens going out during a global pandemic

Barack Hoebama and Hoe Biden

Accidentally had phone sex with my therapist and did tele-therapy with my girlfriend. Ugh, awkward!

Currently home-schooling my two daughters (scratching my balls)

Haven’t tweeted about my height in a while but I assure you that even during quarantine I am in fact 6 foot 5

getting 𝔀𝓮’𝓻𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓿𝓲𝓻𝓾𝓼 tatted on my ass the second we’re released

Sorry I didn’t respond to your text, I was on my phone

couldnt stay silent about this anymore

asked a boy if he likes podcasts and he said “nah i don’t like listening to people”

two girls one diva cup

Hey Chicago Police please dm me if you need someone to run your Twitch channel

Thank you Uncle Tim!

I only watch porn if the people doinking are in love

Lol some people will literally tell you they have a couch when it's actually a loveseat

okaaay boys from palatine, illinois tho 🤤