Wanna fuck or are you just window shopping?

On a separate note, go fuck yourself.

Fuck the procurement department and fuck hippos too.

If you invite me to a seafood place I'm going to ask if their chicken is any good.

I just want a real man, man enough to be real ~

Well who doesn't want to see a lobster fight an eel

Also I'm trying fucking hard to not be annoyed it's a little cloudy on a good fucking meteor shower

Guys, if she likes your Tweet it’s not a booty call, but more like a pocket dial.

Does someone want to come over and make sense of it all

Monday.. I swear just don't be a bitch to me this one time...

Becoming poor has changed my twitter life style

*Maybe Later* a riches to rags story

I have a theory that the first ever people to stub their toes got to create new swear words back in the day

Іs there a contract that men over 40 sіgn requіrіng them to wear ugly sneakers all the time

Not now, babe. I'm manifesting a chalet-style home in a lakeside community.

'What the fuck is wrong with people?' is a thought I shouldn't have to have as often as I do.

How you feel when I touch you is as vital as how you feel when you touch me!

Can I come over and cry with you?

'Boys don't cry'

1950 called, it wants its outdated gender role expectation back.

May be alone but not lonely unless you want to be!

The more chances you give someone the less they value you.