Oh this. This is what’s wrong with me.

“Suicide is selfish because it hurts the people left behind.” No what’s selfish is ignoring someone’s pain while they’re alive, then blaming them when they couldn’t carry it anymore.

Well I guess I’m still a dumb fuck. I would very much like to find a girl that doesn’t just try and manipulate me for money but I guess maybe that’s not an option for me anymore. God fucking dammit.

Sorry. I’m sad and alone tonight. Ignore me.

Again, I believe Demi Adejuyigbe is the funniest person in the world.

The annual tradition of giving your parents your dropout password the day before thanksgiving.

I stand on this business.

Different Squad, Same Results🗣️♥️

Fuck you, happy people. Amen.

Fuck today was depressing

"I thought I kind of walked out [of the dugout] until I saw the video..." 😂 📺 MLB Network Presents: Brett at 4:30pm ET

Reinksei Mastanaga

Nebraska went 5/20 from 2 yesterday That is the fewest number of 2s made in a victory over a ranked opponent in college basketball history

My fandom is right smack dab in the center of the Dropout/Comedy Bang Bang Venn Diagram.

Welp. Tonight was my once-a-year put myself out there night to maybe find some sort of companionship. Went on a date. Got dinner. Got drinks. And then her boyfriend?!? showed up to take her home. And I was left at the table with the tab. Goddammit.

Fuck this place. I lost the war. I hate you all. Your mom’s a whore. Where’s my dog? Cause girls are such a drag.

my mom zelle'd me V-Day money (i know, she's italian) and when i called her i said, thank you for the cash and she said 'thank the seattle seahawks' (i know, she's italian)

This may be the best Twitter ever