I forgot it was St Pattys Day yesterday. I usually eat a leprechaun every year to show em who’s boss. Now they’re all gonna pinch me every time I go to steal their pots of gold for the next year. Ugh. What have I done.

I’ve been quarantined in my lovely cave with all my treasures for years and I turned out fine and diddly! Try getting dragon sickness and then see how you complain about quarantine! Puny humans!

Bofur HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT A CANADIAN IS YOU UNCULTURED SWINE

Smaug Gandalf's Moth ➵ Legolas ➵ Thorin's Majesty *nibbles* Aye!

Glorfindel mk. Lemme recruit my bitches. *whistles* ➵ Legolas ➵ Smaug

➵ Legolas ➵ Gandalf's Moth Smaug Oh, can you actually bend enough to hit me? What an impressive flexibility.

Smaug wins the award for best rendered dragon ever

D'aaaaw thanks hun! <3 x.com/actuallotrmoth…

My being human apparently bothers Thorin's Majesty more than my husband Smaug did

So, uh... What have I missed? being dead and all...

Thumbs...

So, the afterlife is fun. I get to chase Kili and Fili all day.

HEY THRANDUIL YOUR FABULOUSNESS IS SO SHINY, I CAN SEE IT FROM THE AFTERLIFE

My husband is literally the best dragon ever Smaug

Welp.

The crab guy on Moana is my spirit animal.