corny ass adult man making biscuits on his blankie. life with no possibility of parole

Every time I’m alone in an uber I have a 3 second existential crisis about the fact that I’m literally in the car with a stranger. A MAN at that. But once it’s over I’m like Yes I have a personal chauffeur thank u so much I owe u my life

hmm could’ve sworn I saw y’all dts last weekend

he asked me what regards are

Protestors in Downtown Austin kick at least one tear gas canister back at cops.

getting a ton of hateful DMs for siding with the LA protestors, so let me make this super clear ❤️ i will never empathize with ICE. i would rather see 1 million torched Waymos than see another person dragged away in an unmarked car immigrants make America great

wish I could spend my bday with keke palmer. I’m sad don’t talk to me !

Thank you for trying to not let me merge. I had to work for it. And It feels so good to be in this lane now

y’all really took a brainless trash reality show that was fun to watch because it was unserious and made it about “girls girl” feminism, race, slurs, & political views you dug up from old social media posts. imagine how tired we are.

The reason you guys believed Donald Trump wouldn't start more wars, bring on more debt, and release the Epstein files is because you are stupid. You are a stupid person with a baby brain. You would be fooled by a game of peekaboo because you're stupid. 10 hours of keys jingling.

go to your cat and jiggle that freeloader’s pouch right the fuck now

Do yall see how every single person you know irl is totally happy and fine using ai and you sit there feeling like a weird woke chronically online freak for feeling differently because you literally read about how it’s using up the water and killing people and animals

Corporate life requires an ass-licking skillset I simply wasn’t born with.

there’s like 5 active genocides on Earth rn and the God you pray to is more concerned with a gay boy dressing up in a video?

i am not remotely religious until i start feeling like i’m going to throw up. in that case…Are You There, God? It’s Me, Sweaty Margaret. please…mercy….

It's bc you look like a salmon

posting your valuables like this is insane you’re just asking to be robbed

we should be clear about what political violence is. 1. starving people when there is enough food for all of us to eat. 2. denying people healthcare so they die from preventable illnesses 3. denying people shelter 4. increasing police budgets across the country

On the 24th anniversary of 9/11 we remember the lives lost, honor the heroes who rose in the face of tragedy, and stand united in the enduring strength of the American spirit—America will never forget 🙏🇺🇸