Woke up just in time for siesta.

🎶

No PlayStation, No iPhone, just good times.

Sorry not sorry.

Chelsea team looks young christ

#LFC This is painful to watch. Lack of investment is ruining this team.

“Right, whose round is it?” Translation: It is not my round and I know whose round it is.

Yeah, I lost two fingers in prison! So what!?

Not in Ireland, it wasn't!

I was in my mechanics today & he has put up his new price list 🚙 😅

Parky was a very accurate judge of character. 🤣

Hey dire wolf I was in a book shop today in Derry and saw these for sale, and thought of you. 👍😅

I used to date a sniper but she broke up with me. I'm trying to get her back but i know it's a long shot.

“Psssst, got any marbles?”👀

Ibiza, drinking wine at Cafe Del Mar, watching the sunset. Chill-out music emanating all around us. The beach in front of us, littered with fire jugglers & chilled-out young people just living for the moment - an amazing experience!

Welcome on board Equine Airways. This is your pilot, Iva Hoss, speaking. We're currently taxiing to runway 3, in preparation for takeoff. Our estimated flight time today will be 4 hours. Eqiine Airways enforces a 'no smoking & no shitting all over the floor' policy.

All I'm saying is if paper beats rock why are rocks used as paperweights?