Could all past and present soldiers of D Squadron please DM me. I’m putting something together. thetimes.co.uk/article/youll-…

Right now this entire country feels like it’s being run by the contestants off the Apprentice.

I’m strangely drawn to the hands of The Giant: Gyimah Davies… is it fake tan? A bit of bistro? What???

Distilleration. For the nation. #TheApprentice

Cheese is to be SAVIOURED. #TheApprentice

Daily Lewdle 27 4/6 ⬛🟩⬛⬛⬛ ⬛🟩⬛⬛🟩 🟩🟩⬛⬛⬛ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 lewdlegame.com

Wordle 240 5/6 ⬜⬜🟨⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜🟨 ⬜🟨🟩⬜🟨 ⬜🟩⬜🟩⬜ 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

Thankfully my 26 years teaching has been more Ollie Plimsolls than Mr King. 😬 #InsideNo9

Not really sure this is the shot I wanted to share with Ricky Gervais to say ‘My dog is loving #SuperNature too’ 😬

Why is James May randomly haunted by an ethereal figure? First in Episode 1 and then again in Campotosto. #OurManInItaly #ohmioDioèunfantasma

As if I needed another reason to DEFINITELY NOT want her as PM.

Deary me Bim. Get well soon. 🤕James May

@laurenlaverne BBC Radio 6 Music Merry #CarDownStepsDay to all who celebrate. Let us remember the true meaning of this blessèd day, and not the commercialised version it has become. To commemorate it, here is my artistic recreation:

After the coma I was in a geriatric ward. Some of the agency night nurses seemed irritated. One wouldn't let me have the buzzer. One got cross when I fell out of bed. I was lonely and called home. Emma couldn't come in. At least you, Boris were having parties though. That's good

I just signed the petition calling on Boris Johnson's resignation honours to be blocked. Will you sign too? you.38degrees.org.uk/petitions/bloc… via 38 Degrees

You’re in luck, I HAVE brought urine.