the most insane thing i have ever seen in my entire life please god watch this

just realized vienna waits for me.

everyone who got pink pilates princess in their spotify wrapped

oh ok

every time it hits below 50 degrees in charleston I’m googling “what to wear when it’s cold”

So we started with a violation

when the waitress says “anything else I can get for you”, so u know she’s feeling u

watching old rhony and i hate to say it but i’m seeing a lot of myself in ramona

him: are you fucking stupid me:

I bring a sort of “There should be no restrictions on border crossings or residence” vibe that infuriates people who have never deeply interrogated why they feel otherwise

how it feels to say "my client"

the most proud, openly gay guy from my hs who was obsessed w doing (amazing) lady gaga dance performances, is now super MAGA . truly gut wrenching whenever i see someone get lohanthonyed :(

walking into total wine like i’m That Bitch (here to buy torani syrup)

Your baby on board sticker isn’t gonna make me any less drunk

when u think about it, every boner comes from the heart <3

i truly believe a harlem shake revival would cure society

Oh so no death cab for ugly? Ugly has to walk?

women in PHLEGM (poetry, history, language, english literature, ghost stories, music)

Whenever someone says that the greatest show of all time is The Sopranos or Breaking Bad or The Wire or Mad Men etc I think to myself, “This idiot has clearly never seen Vanderpump Rules seasons 2, 3, and 10.”

flying across the country with my real id, my real ego, my real superego