We are the rough edges.

Thank fuck for music and carbs.

Some days the need to run to the mountains is stronger

I’m in a mood today

You done letting him waste your time yet? It's my turn

There's a fine line between love and murder. Or so I tell all of my victims.

Welcome to your 40's where you dont even have to drink the night before to wake up feeling hungover

Let's make it weird.

Fun fact: The most powerful person in any family is the person who tells the other family members what to bring to Thanksgiving dinner.

Nodding like I know. But I don't know. I do not.

I’m detecting a little sarcasm

You can laugh or you can slowly wither away, but you're the only one who can make that choice.

Oh universe you are so fucking funny.

Dear College Girls Who Dye Your Hair Gray, You are REALLY going to regret that shit when you're 50. Signed, People With Real Gray Hair

If you’re not music then I don’t want to hear you today.

I just want someone to travel the world and trash hotel rooms with.

LIFE HACK: Send your husband out for milk. Pack up and leave him.

"I'm only human" sounds an awful lot like "I'm not gonna hold myself accountable for my bullshit"