@KathrynWest_ 🌷 sorry i have that effect on people

"choose your punishment. you can either fight your way through a pit of 100 zombies, or you can flirt with someone for-" "pit." "but-" "PIT"

"if i wasn't sleeping enough, could i do THIS?" [falls asleep in the middle of a zombie swarm]

the signs and their favorite z nation character! all of them except gemini: not murphy gemini: murphy

//this account already has more followers than my personal account and I've had this for less than three weeks

#confession sometimes i forget that warren has a first name and that name isn't mom

little known fact: mack and addy got apocalypse married. i was both the best man and the flower girl. it was awesome.

//WE INTERRUPT THIS ACCOUNT TO YELL EXCITEDLY ABOUT THE FACT THAT HAMILTON WON A GRAMMY

the next time i hear murphy shout "Z'S NUTS" i'm throwing him

Pup is low key the best character on z nation

the reason i'm so quiet isn't because i don't have much to say. it's because everything i think is some form of burn on everyone.

you can't bribe me into working for y- are those twinkies? okay so i'm best at long range but i'm also good in close quarters situations

whenever i want to piss murphy off (always) i bring up urban legends. "yeah my cousin in new york worked in the sewers. gators everywhere."

the time doc astral projected on peyote just confirms that his superpower is getting high and saving our asses

the only bad episode is the pilot, aka the episode i'm not in. coincidence? i think not.

why was the first zombaby so strong? babies are already useless. zombies: also useless. zombabies: useless squared

"wow, 10k, you look like you never sleep!" that's because i never sleep!

i think we all know that the real question for season three is whether or not im alive

i would definitely recommend hiding everyone's shit in murphy's tent. warren just punched him in the gut. this is the best day ever.

if you want to truly fuck with murphy, replace every narcotic in his tent with raisins. when he asks why, tell him the raisins are healthier