shoutout to my one guy friend that texted the girls in the groupchat happy international women’s day at 12:01 am i was unfamiliar with your game

Date idea: I drink three espresso martinis and then you try to catch me

In a world where the Oxford comma is mandatory, misunderstandings like this would never occur.

jesus has been casted in the live action of bible

back in my day we would deadass just post words on a colored background on ig with “like for tbh + ratee” we are losing the ancient texts

thunderstorms in march just doesn’t sound right

legit just saw this last month i WILL be back

A nonchalant person has absolutely nothing to offer me fr

i have a lot riding on my team this year fantasy.espn.com/baseball/share…

that last pitch will haunt me i’m sorry how can that ump be that fucking blind

whatever the fvck i want

tea is tea whether herbal or verbal

I USED TO PRAY FOR TIMES LIKE THIS

maybe if they stop putting televised games behind a paywall through different streaming services then more people would watch but ha! who am i to know

my close and personal friend orpheus is working on it please be patient unfortunately the gods have forgotten the song of their love :(((

march madness experts: why are two first-four teams ranked 11 and the other ones ranked 16? shouldn’t they all be technically ranked 16 if they win?

IKTR!! they deserve it!!

forgot how good it feels to hear new music about love when you’re in love

i’m sorry but austin wells needs to keep his dominican fade for the season. i fear we have unlocked a new beast. im so ready.