When you have a titan as a child, babysitters never get paid.

Calling a girl "honey" is ok. Calling a girl "bee vomit" is not ok. I'm a relationship expert.

Terra cannot be tamed.

“@Derping_Shinobu: ALEX I THINK YOURE HUSBAND HAS RABIES” ITS OUT OF MY HANDS BY THIS POINT SHINOBU. ALL YOU CAN DO IS GET YOUR RABIES SHOT.

@Derping_Shinobu Yes. He came in like a wrecking ball. And now he's going to infect you all.

[whispers] da yaois man da y a o i s

@Derping_Shinobu I'd like to thank all the little people for nominating me.

I HAVE TO GO TO BED. STAY CRAY YOU SHITS. <3

How to Train Your Dragon 2 is a must see film for your kids this summer #httyd2event DreamWorks Animation

Dragon simulator!! Flying my own dragon at Dreamworks!! #httyd2event

/Is quietly sniffing because Axel's grown up so fast since his first tweet. #AxelsTwitterversaryParty

AXEL YOU'VE GROWN SO MUCH SO SHUSH. ALSO, SOMEONE HAND ME A TISSUE. #AxelsTwitterversaryParty

/Takes the tissue from Axel. So proud of you. /Casually stuffs a weed brownie in the redhead's mouth. #AxelsTwitterversaryParty

AHHHHHHHH

I'm kawaii and I know it~

/Slithers away to personal.