THERE WERE NO WOMEN IN THE SUB BECAUSE EXTREME TOURISM FOR US IS JUST “”WALKING ALONE””

Marriage: one of you had fries for lunch and now you BOTH can’t have fries for dinner

So close to having Nowaysis mentioned on Jeopardy 🤏🏻

Me eating buttered noodles all weekend while my husband is out of town:

theonion.com/nation-could-h…

boy math is when he does the oil changes and snow shoveling and she does the cooking and laundry and he decides they have equal workloads because they both do two chores

Have they checked the British Museum?

hey sorry i can’t come today i have to watch six straight hours of law and order SVU

The poster for the final season of Netflix’s ‘THE CROWN’ has been released.

Hey! Where am I??? My flavor would be anchovy.

LASAGNA

In This Life 🎹 😢

“what do you want to be for Halloween” in bed by 10

Is there any better feeling than watching Law and Order SVU in a fancy hotel room? USA marathons are the GOAT

Italian PE teacher explaining long jump.

I had no idea that Uma is a nepo baby 😭

🥰🥰🥰 Britpopple #500 🔊🟩⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️⬜️ #Britpopple #Heardle Britpopple britpopple.glitch.me

Much like the earthquake I’m also a 4.8 in New York

thought this was a pulp setlist for a sec