I'm glad Arsenal lost today. We want our guard of honour at the Etihad in April we don't want to win it too soon

And not one college student was sad

The Prime Minister will today ask us to believe that despite having previously been the Director of Public Prosecutions, he never thought to check if a twice-fired Govt minister had passed security vetting before he made him our top diplomat. Pigs may also fly.

It's absolutely delicious that the *ONLY* defence Keir Starmer has now is to claim he "was repeatedly lied to by his advisers and didn't know what was going on in his own house and his own office" Yet, here he is accusing Boris Johnson of EXACTLY THAT! You couldn't make it up.

🚨 WATCH: Lee Anderson is kicked out of the Commons after accusing Keir Starmer of lying "That man couldn't lie straight in bed"

What I find so blindingly hypocritical is the outrage over Jeffrey Epstein by the left, but not this!

Never forget, Britain is a country that banned Kanye West from entering but allowed a murderer from Egypt to arrive by small boat and gang rape a British girl. The establishment must be smashed.

Locking up the fox in a hen coop. What the hell are we doing to allow this madness?

He’s spot on 🎯

It's perfectly possible that Zack Polanski accidentally hypnotised himself into being the biggest tit in Britain.

Sir Jim Ratcliffe was right. And everyone knows it.

Looks like a Snapchat filter

it was written World War II and she read that as eleven, incredible

Labour MPs have now done more to protect Keir Starmer than they’ve done to protect British farmers, veterans, pensioners, taxpayers, women and girls or Chagos. They deserve the Labour bloodbath on May 7th.

The community note 😭

I live in a country where a man randomly stabs two people and people are more annoyed that the police kicked him after he did so In a proper country he is eliminated there and then 👍

Jesus James

Wait, you mean he was running around promising women he could grow their breasts through hypnosis without a license?!

Why does he tell these lies? He lied about working for the British Red Cross That’s the reason why his past life as a hypnotherapist matters. He lied about what he did with The Sun and then - years later - he lied to Susanna Reid and Ed Balls