Remember when Farage was just a guy who'd pop up on Question Time every month to shout "Chorizo's made of donkeys. Sorry, but it's true!"?

#Surrey Fri #ComedyCottage @HarlequinTheatth Ian Cognito Redhill Donald Trump @sindhuvfunny @Obonjocomedy @SoniaAste harlequintheatre.co.uk/whats-on/comed…

"Thomas Mair was a loner with no social circle." Well, none except Britain First and the Springbok Club...

I'm at the Harlequin tonight, you lucky Redhill...

Crooked Reigate keep pretending they're best. So sad. x.com/ReigateUK/stat…

I believe in national sovereignty. Except for the nation of Scotland, who should do as they're fucking told.

People upset about a bit of hand-holding should remember that throughout the Yalta conference Churchill cupped Roosevelt's balls.

Guys. This was meant to be a joke. x.com/Natt/status/80…

Long queues up and down the A23 are a symbol of our security. We mustn't let undocumented Mersthams into great Redhill Town.

We will build the wall. After the eight-to-ten well wait for planning from Reigate & Banstead Council.

Fake Trumps! So sad. x.com/robertwoolley/…

Redhill Donald Trump a charlatan and cad. Bringing disrepute to the good name of Trump! #theresonlyone@RedhillDonald

We're pulling out of the Paris Climate Change Accord. I was elected to represent the people of Pendleton Rd, not Paris.

A friend of a friend is a firefighter. Please read & share what he has to say about cuts to the emergency services.

If they didn't want to burn to death in substandard housing what on earth were they doing being poor in the first place?

Huge news. Great talks with the foxes. Together we will set up Combined Henhouse Security Task Force.

If I publish a book which is just me regurgitating Milo, but saying "NOT" after every sentence, would 152 of you buy it? RT if you will...

Why are you hitting yourself, Kim Jong Un? why are you hitting yourself?

Police remain on scene in #OxfordStreet Oxford Circus - no evidence of shots... news.met.police.uk/news/update-in…

just heard a friend had to bring her own food to a Christmas do at Holiday Inn by IHG in #wembley, as she has coeliac disease. Really?? It's 2017!! Could you not even provide a jacket potato?? #holidayinn #epicfail #coeliac