alana ✨ #1 jayce understander (@ptolemaenia) 's Twitter Profile
alana ✨ #1 jayce understander

@ptolemaenia

not priv but i can be weirder on here || 29 || she/her || 🏳️‍🌈

ID: 1791779432727814148

calendar_today18-05-2024 10:35:24

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alana ✨ #1 jayce understander (@ptolemaenia) 's Twitter Profile Photo

jesus until this very moment i like. forgot its not “allowed” to own a handgun in the UK for most people. christ almighty i shot my first pistol when i was 6

alana ✨ #1 jayce understander (@ptolemaenia) 's Twitter Profile Photo

there was a lot of people smelling like sweaty sneakers and wet jeans from their baggy pants dragging on the ground too. Or maybe i was just in middle school

alana ✨ #1 jayce understander (@ptolemaenia) 's Twitter Profile Photo

tried the ol 40mg indica gummie trick to try and battle zoloft nausea + insomnia but now i’m just. tired+wired+nauseous+stoned. Badly.

oh, what a strange salvation! (@nonblnary) 's Twitter Profile Photo

me: you need to listen to the decemberists i promise its not like all the stereotypes about them. they’re a really incredible band the decemberists:

me: you need to listen to the decemberists i promise its not like all the stereotypes about them. they’re a really incredible band
the decemberists:
ally 🦋✨🎧⸆⸉ (@ally_sheehan) 's Twitter Profile Photo

asked a friend if contestants on survivor get to take a "token" from the outside world into the jungle and realised i was thinking of the hunger games

Avery Edison (@aedison) 's Twitter Profile Photo

ME: i’m sick and tired of being set upon by the baron’s hounds HER: Maybe stop hopping the fence into his estate? ME: sympathy not solutions plz HER: I’m so sorry, that sounds painful. I know you’re trying really hard to get The Baron’s priceless egg. ME: it should be MY egg :(

jeanstor (@tw1nkd3str0yer) 's Twitter Profile Photo

recently spoke with a pre verbal baby. he was holding milk i was holding wine. he offered me his milk; i said im good. he then gestured for my wine. i said you cannot have this

chody (@wodyjalls) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Yesterday at the dispensary the woman helping me was like, “you have $2 in rewards if you want to use it” and i was like “I’ll hold onto it” and she went “ok billionaire”