gay people can never just say “i love you” it’s always shit like

jesus until this very moment i like. forgot its not “allowed” to own a handgun in the UK for most people. christ almighty i shot my first pistol when i was 6

day 2 on zoloft and I feel like wind hitting the wrong way could make me puke

there was a lot of people smelling like sweaty sneakers and wet jeans from their baggy pants dragging on the ground too. Or maybe i was just in middle school

tried the ol 40mg indica gummie trick to try and battle zoloft nausea + insomnia but now i’m just. tired+wired+nauseous+stoned. Badly.

and i ate a banana pudding. #IsSheStupid

while searching for her

me: you need to listen to the decemberists i promise its not like all the stereotypes about them. they’re a really incredible band the decemberists:

If you press the right buttons on your phone the Hairspray soundtrack comes on

asked a friend if contestants on survivor get to take a "token" from the outside world into the jungle and realised i was thinking of the hunger games

ME: i’m sick and tired of being set upon by the baron’s hounds HER: Maybe stop hopping the fence into his estate? ME: sympathy not solutions plz HER: I’m so sorry, that sounds painful. I know you’re trying really hard to get The Baron’s priceless egg. ME: it should be MY egg :(

hey wait the door shapes dont make sense

anders and justice

recently spoke with a pre verbal baby. he was holding milk i was holding wine. he offered me his milk; i said im good. he then gestured for my wine. i said you cannot have this

gay boy

Yesterday at the dispensary the woman helping me was like, “you have $2 in rewards if you want to use it” and i was like “I’ll hold onto it” and she went “ok billionaire”