Got too out of hand on thanksgiving, girlfriend is putting me back in the crate

They got rid of the panty raid SpongeBob episode

To whoever was playing saxophone in the dark alley between inside the 5 and the sylvania police station, who hurt you?

I just think it’s crazy that Domino’s let “plowing for pizza” get approved without question

What if we kissed at the Valvoline Instant Oil Change?

yeah im excited for dune 2.. dune 2 others as i would have them dune 2 me

Is blud serious rn

Just a little something to get through the day.

Filling the bong with pickle juice

bartender: can i see some id? me: yeah sure [opens purse and unleashes my scarab upon him]

This and a black coffee is breakfast

RIP to a #realhooper and a #realbeater 🫡

i just checked the santa tracker and it says he’s currently ovulating

Willem Dafoe will get his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame next week.