The walk of shame after a night with a cougar hits different when she sends you home with mashed potatoes in a tupperware container.

It's important that you tell your children your story.

'No sweetheart, Daddy was never in a war. But here's a picture of me screaming at a seagull in 1993.'

Revenge is a dish best served cold. Or warm if you heat it up. I've also had it in the air fryer with a little cheese. The point is I'm mad at you. And hungry.

no, you’re not too old to take selfies with your tongue out, that’s dumb at any age

If Shakespeare wrote 'Much Ado About Nothing' today it'd just be called 'Whatever'.

Our time is our most significant currency. Stop wasting your time on people who are equivalent to gas station sushi.

Never trust a guy over 30 who wears a baseball cap backwards. You’re welcome.

Nothing more annoying than an instant DM after a follow. Just saying.

Nwaswitshaka male chasing away an intruder who I think is Skorro Orpen male!!

#LoveLions
🎥 jaco_wildlife Instagram

This yellow lizard is a pet asking for a pat. Every living being wants to be loved.

Adorable

He’s not the stepdad, he’s the dad who stepped up
Happy #Caturday

The Golden King 👑

The magnificent Blondie Mahiwa male.
Incredible!!

#LoveLions
🎥 dan_roberts_07 Instagram

Rare white bison..

Stealing candy from babies is a huge kindness when you think about it. Candy is terrible for babies.

Just learned that our city’s indoor soccer complex sells draft beer so next I gotta convince my wife how rewarding indoor soccer would be for our son.