Here's a list of food that gets stuck in my #beard when I eat. All of it.

Imagine explaining a Peloton to a person in a 3rd world country: - You paid $1200 for a bike?? Is it super fast or something? - No, doesn’t go anywhere - Oh, does it power your home? - No, helps you burn fat - burn fat? Is it at least fun? - No, a hotter person yells at u

People who hook their keys onto a belt loop give me the boak.

I'm 100% confident I've ate more Irn Bru, Wham and Refresher bars than anyone who's ever lived.

Spend about 90% of time on Instagram looking at photos of cameras I can't afford, and the other 10% looking at actual photos 😂

It is with profound sadness that we announce the passing of our former manager, chairman and club legend, Walter Smith. rng.rs/3Gkx3YZ

Next Old Firm game.

Alexander ‘Greek’ Thomson’s Church Ruins #Glasgow #Scotland AlexanderThomson_Soc Discover Glasgow Lost Glasgow Glasgow Live Glasgow West End Today @news4Glasgow What's On Glasgow Past Glasgow #architecture Glasgow City Council History Scotland Historic Environment Scotland VisitScotland Glasgow City Heritage Trust #church

DAVID GOGGINS ENERGY! #davidgoggins #Motivation #Comedypodcast

Looking for 1 or 2 tickets to The Darkness Glasgow gig if anyone is selling please get in touch 🤘🏻

Let me rephrase this coz that isnae Scottish. A square sausage. Bin the hash brown tomato and lettuce, replace it with a tottie scone. And it's called a runny yolk, no eggs over easy 🤦🏻‍♂️ And pit it oan a crispy McGhees or Mortons roll ffs. Tap it aff wae Tomato or Broon sauce

Snapped this boay on Buchanan St. Kinda reminded me of twitch.tv/Limmy

Alexa , Play Clyde 1

If this doesn't sell cricket to people then I give up

Bo Nickal is a complete snore fest of a fighter. #UFC300

HOLLOWAY STANDS AND TRADES AND KNOCKS OUT JUSTIN GAETHJE COLD #UFC300 x.com/Haduuuucken/st…

Your first look at Tires. Coming to Netflix on May 23

ALEX PERIERA BATTERED KHALIL ROUNDTREE IN THE 4TH ROUND 😳😳 #UFC307 💥💥🥊🥊🥊 x.com/fightzCenter/s…

This is my first time in Scotland Glasgow is LOVELY #PMSLive