If I had a dollar every time Mallory Carroll answered my phone call, I’d have approx. $0.00.

Every time Josh spends hundreds of dollars on flowers, pots, and patio decor, I automatically am allowed the same amount of spending money at Sephora. There is no question about it.

I uploaded to my Instagram story in my bathrobe. I’ve become too comfortable on social media. 😬

J: why do you keep ordering so much baby stuff? Me: 👀…. J: there’s just always a new package on the doorstep everyday. Me: because… we’re having a baby…..? TF?

Day 3 of cheer camp. Heartburn and headaches are pretty consistent at this point. Girls are still just as mean now as they were when I was cheering. Send words of encouragement, Tums, or chick fil a.

Pleaseeeee blood pressure…. let me make it just to September 1st with this baby. I will cry if I have 2 kids with a peridot birthstone 😭😭😭

Physically, I’m 38 weeks pregnant. Mentally…it’s been 84 years. #sendhelp #justkidding👀

10% off the total purchase is not incentive enough for me to give you my email address. Just let me buy something without a million pop ups😭😭😭

New Girl

How dare my husband budget a monthly massage for himself but not for me.

Tigers hold and win 42-41 Yorktown High School YHS Sports Medicine @GusMartin_SP thegridirondigest Hoosier Heritage Conference Robby General The Gridiron Digest Yorktown Strength

Tigers Sectional Champions Yorktown High School YHS Sports Medicine @GusMartin_SP thegridirondigest Hoosier Heritage Conference Robby General The Gridiron Digest Yorktown Strength

Josh to me: I don’t want anything for Christmas. Just happy kids and a clean house. Me to Josh: *sends another picture of a Disney item I’d like #wearenothesame

How is it not 11 PM?

Baby woke up. Colts started doing “good.” Baby falls back asleep. Josh won’t let me take him to bed because he now thinks he’s a good luck charm. BEING A COLTS FAN IS THE WORST.

Baby sleeps through an hour of fireworks outside his window…. Wakes up to the floor creaking as I walk to the bathroom. Really?

Does anyone else respond to stress with extreme emotional outbursts? Or just me? Ok cool.

For first time in almost 40 years…the Alex Tiger AMHS Golf team is CIC champions!!! Super proud AD fellas!!!!! Rob Hunt @thbsports @Alex #AlexTigers #FightOn

Parents in the group chats🙅🏻‍♀️

TAYLOR SWIFT TICKETS---4 for Sat. night, Nov. 2. ONE WINNER, will also buy dinner at Wisanggeni Pawon on E. 71st St. Retweet this & TELL ME WHY IT SHOULD BE YOU. Must incl. hashtag #ForTheShoe🙂 Fri. NOON deadline. Will be many worthy entries, but I can only pick one! ✌️