the two wolves in me are both calling in sick on thursday

You think that’s stubborn? I haven’t updated my app since before the company was sold. The icon still says Twitter. I can’t see any blue checks. I can still see what device you posted from. I can still see all of your likes. The search function may no longer work, but I Am Free.

The day the app gives up for good, so do I. I refuse to update. It’s a matter of principle. I am carrying on the legacy of all the boomers who still cling to their antennae TVs, and the Gen Xers who refused to upgrade from VHS to DVDs. I will never falter. I’ll stand my ground.

there’s something beautiful about two Sagittariuses sympathizing with each other about their crushes on earth signs

sorry still can't believe mr swift and mr williams were standing next to each other for castles crumbling

not to be controversial but personally i think we should have more options than a gently alive corpse and the dumbest Hitler of all time

tbh I just want a boyfriend so I have someone to text “babe, he rolled a good sandwich today”

I don’t want a boyfriend I want a hostage that has to listen to me monologue about the most chronically online bullshit

i can’t believe he said this…

tøp's best opener will forever be jon bellion

Badflower goes hard

gonna start referring to anything I keep or don’t keep when my roommate moves as “won/lost in the divorce”

girl who treats columbus ohio like anime fans treat japan because of twenty one pilots 😔

“we want grandchildren” best I can do is aint it fun by paramore at karaoke night

“they’re doing transgender surgeries on illegal aliens” is just the plot of The Rocky Horror Picture Show

inside of you are two wolves. neither have been diagnosed but you’re pretty sure one has inattentive adhd and the other ocd with some contamination-specific tendencies. you are but a battleground for them.

Thank you saving my life New Jersey Michael

garden song by phoebe bridgers and come over by noah kahan take place in the same house send tweet

"weird girl" this "weird girl" that clearly none of you watched hetalia or went to school in sherlock cosplay or engaged in 2014 supernatural tumblr discourse. gimme a break. those are the real queens.