my life is incredible

i would like to hear picasso's cats’ side of the story.

I will never not share when I see it

Your 30s are when you truly blossom into a horny little pervert

when the Chinese restaurant my best friend and I planned to grow old in together closed I cried to the owner and she gave me a tea pot from the kitchen and it’s my most treasured possession

it would be over for him

“Fuuuuck its so deep” I whisper as I hit a pothole going 45mph

I'm NO man's peace. I got a question at 6am sharp

I just send them something insane then a few months later we meet in person for the first time and then a few months after that we are all having slumber parties and sleeping in the same bed at each others real homes

why is wearing a hat as someone who doesn't usually wear hats so difficult and humiliating. it feels like everyone can tell i don't know what i'm doing

once again a population density ma- OHIO?

but I would show up.

this is how my chihuahua walks around the house while he blatantly disobeys me

remember that year I wrote fanfic and never told anyone?

this is one of the most important pieces of literature I have ever read

Imagine like you live with a giant who you cannot communicate at all with. The giant will feed you and see to your basic needs in exchange for occasionally subjecting to horrors beyond anything your brain can even begin to comprehend.

both of them got his ass honestly

Can you have your cameraman DM me