When ppl be weird to me I start to gatekeep my personality from them. No more laughs for you bitch

an insecure man will make you feel like being a bad bitch is against the law

me as a detective: ok wait omg

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hate wasting my jokes on a boring hoe i could’ve said that to a bad bitch

Babe what’s wrong? You haven’t even touched your creatini.

Get you a dude who loves you even though you’re a fuckin bitch

she begged you not to embarrass her motherfucker

he already does

So you agree? You think this country has a problem with gun violence.

So Tyler Robinson, Charlie Kirk’s killer, is neither a Democrat, nor transgender, nor an immigrant, but instead a 22-year-old white guy from a Republican family in Utah who loves guns and wore a Donald Trump costume on Halloween. — Did I get that right?

me: "i love skincare!" me when it’s time to wash my face at night:

WHEN????

my ducks: in a row my elephant: addressed my eggs: several baskets my bigger fish: fried