“Are you sure?” “Yeah, Johnson, we are. We need you to go piss in Rae’s Creek.”

Fooler v. China. Tonight. On Paramount+

Rory on 15 this week (and we'll forget Thursday if he wins)

The Sunday Rors

I would not be opposed to a playoff 😂

Holy shit!

RORY MCILROY WINS THE MASTERS! 🌺🏆

My birthday twin did it! Way to go Rory!

🚨 NEEDS a good week. Tomorrow we go. 11:10 eastern. Not featured. Let’s have a day. Last 5 winning scores have ranged from -13 to -22. Let’s go out and play well! #GoRickie

Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, so ima always shit on company time.

golf is the greatest because it's the only sport where they'll bring in an analyst to earnestly say something like, "well guys, the lie's brutal, but the real key here is not falling into the lake..."

If I ran into these guys on the course - I’m throwing them all in the lake

Man, it was so lucky that James Bond had this Q Gadget on him at the exact (and only) moment in the series when he could make use of it... Anyway, according to the date on the cheque, Max Zorin's party took place exactly 40 years ago today! 🎬 #JamesBond #AVTAKat40

A+ tweet to me

Serious shade being thrown in the PGA Championship press room:

The railroad marshaling yard noise at the Charles Schwab Challenge always gets to me. 😂