[traits of the female character I’ve been planning for 50 years] she’s schizophrenic, she’s good at math, and she wants to fuck her brother

the moral arc of the universe is long but it bends towards jokic

[dentist after poking my gums for 30 mins with sharp metal hooks] seeing a little more bleeding here than I would like…

babe, stop, I didn’t say she was cute. I said her taut, lithe body dazzled me

in the optimized version of new york city, the sidewalks are moving walkways and instead of sirens the ambulances play “trophies” by drake

every cultural scandal in France is someone pointing out the most famous person in a niche field has been publicly saying the most pedophilic things for the last thirty years

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke: what if a kind dumb guy journaled Meditations by Marcus Aurelius: what if a whiny emperor couldn’t stop journaling

please take some comfort, we were able to rule out a shameful death by suicide. he actually died choking and jacking himself off

if you do the NYT mini crossword, you are a tiny intellect. a worm to me. i solve Rubik’s cubes blindfolded. sudokus with only a few numbers filled in. i have never worn deodorant that wasn’t axe body spray

babe of course I can compliment your specific facial features, it just starts to feel like phrenology and you know i’m in my anti-racist era right now

girls will drape themselves across your body like a velvet curtain and then ask why you didn’t sleep well

nyc subways in summer are the closest earth gets to religious conceptions of hell: subterranean, extremely hot, full of beings of otherworldly evil (cops, ppl watching videos sound on with no headphones)

give it to me straight doc - how concretely can i visualize an apple in my head

bitch pussy look like trae young’s head