@hendrix_mac

Bitches be like I just got this candle & Im so excited to leave it unattended and burn my house down🥹❤️

out here wearing full chain link armor i’m scaring the bitches

Got in trouble at the dentist today after I ate all of their equipment

Remember not to drunk drive on thanksgiving unless you have somewhere you need to go or if you just want to

If your dog is retarded and useless im going to boil and eat it

Me and my soccer team are stuck in a cave

Post nut press conference

Y’all remember when Rocky fought the apostles creed

no better feeling than when you finish a good book & can finally eat the bookmark

Nissan should make a nissan altima hellcat that competes with the spacex rocket

Bitches be like, “my hair is so gross today” 🤮

The P.I. In magnum p.i. stands for Pass Interference

my horny ass could NOT go to the dominican republic😭😭😭😭

Augmented reality is amazing

Fellas, is it gay to live with other dudes?

Jumping someone’s car for them by stealing it

Got so bored today, just got out of my car and started illegally directing traffic