Panicked thinking I had accidentally sent a Snapchat to someone I haven’t talked to in years but no- it was just a notification that they had just now opened one I sent them 246 WEEKS ago 💀

Why am I seeing all of el*n m*sk tweets all of a sudden? 🤮Fastest block ever lol

Lot of divorced guy energy on this site lately

mm/dd/yyyy is a cursed date format

i think it is simply beautiful when a man is able to look past my mental illness and love me for my boobs

Weird how weaning myself offline totally is actually working lol. Nice that it coincides with this website falling to shit lmao

“When I get dead I wanna go to outer space.”- my 6 year old son.

I’m really trying with mastodon but it is giving me the same feeling of having complex board game rules explained to me

If I start typing paragraphs that’s when I know I gotta stop talking to someone. Vulnerable era is over. Gonna be a forest dwelling himbo that chops wood and gardens when I have any feeling beyond true neutral.

Drunk selfie bc I stripped the pink out of my hair today using baking soda and I’m also still stuck at work fixing my code lmao

Just wanna be on a discord server where my online friends occasionally play like jackbox games and shitpost or something dumb but also where I can disappear for 6 months at a time and it’s totally cool. (But alas I do not have enough online friends for this dream to be reality)

I’m making mac & cheese and deviled eggs for thanksgiving. I apologize to everyone who doesn’t get any of my southern love 😋

Who needs filters when you could just only take selfies when you’re ovulating

Cannot believe my sister accidentally dressed as Dwayne the Rock Johnson for thanksgiving 💀