Hey did you catch the Sugar Bowl? Omg the Duke’s Mayonnaise Bowl was crazy. I can’t believe the reffing during the Vienna Sausage Bowl. I’m planning a tailgate party for the Chamoy Pickle bowl

thought I planted a tulip but turns out it was an onion

he’s so cuuuuute

gf says because we got chinese yesterday we can’t get it again today. i don’t think that makes sense . they do it in china all the time

my friend is a teacher and he said the texas phone ban is working at his school although now he says the kids are all gambling with dice

The world you were raised to live in no longer exists

every pic of trump looks like this now

Could a depressed person do THIS? [taps head and rubs belly simultaneously]

I did not do it! #ImTinaandInnocent

dude I had no idea how many people thought Charlie Kirk was chill like they fucking walk among us

me at fourteen for some reason

How Spanish teachers talk about vosotros

I’m gonna bring planking back

Naming your son Guy is the funniest possible Thing

Do you think all these Navajo children at the Gallup, New Mexico panda express know what 67 is

I tried the joke “I never would’ve gotten on a boat called ‘the poop cruise’” twice this evening and it didn’t land either time

Just literally not how one would have a normal response to conspiracies about their spouse’s assassination btw