Had a dream we traded Andujar for a starting pitcher, signed Machado to play 3b, didn't resign Gardner or extend Hicks for 7yrs & signed Bryce Harper to play LF/DH/1b. Then I woke up! Thank goodness I dodged that plan 3 months ago. #Yankees New York Yankees #MLB

I assure you, #Yankees Stadium will be buzzing this October!

Check's in the mail, Sweeny @YankeesWFAN Don't cash it until November 2026. #Yankees.

I'd like to announce the #Yankees have given GM Brian Cashman a lifetime appointment!

I want all #Yankees fans to know we're looking in the mirror and asking ourselves some tough questions!

On pace for the all-time AL HR Record. Possible Triple Crown. Probable MVP. No #Yankees contract in place for Aaron Judge next season. Priceless.

I have a lot of questions just like you #Yankees fans!

A statement from the #Yankees owner...

Fire Aaron Boone? He has 2 years left on his contract. I am not going to pay him to sit at home & do nothing! I'd rather pay him to sit in the dugout & do nothing! #Yankees

My expectations for the 2023 #Yankees Boone & Cashman will lead us to great heights! Josh Donaldson will have a bounce back season! A 100% return to health from everyone! A fire burning in the bellies of us all to be better! And of course, all of your money!

I promise all #Yankees fans that I will get answers from Cashman!

Look, I'd fire Brian Cashman in a N.Y. minute, but then I'd have to change the contacts in my phone & we all know what a headache that is. So I'd like to announce a 3 Year Contract Extension to be #Yankees GM for Brian! Go get'em, Tiger!

Dumb's the word, #Yankees fans!

Who do I blame for #Yankees Postseason failures?

I feel seen.

Not only am I bringing Boone & Cashman back to the #Yankees...

A message to Yankees fans attending tonight's pivotal game 3 vs the Blue Jays: If we're losing, please drink heavily. I need to make up the lost revenue for game 4. Thanks for a great season, suckers...err..I meant, fans, Hal

I want to assure all #Yankees fans that we're working tirelessly to find diamonds in the rough. Regular diamonds are just too expensive. I should know. My favorite anklet & cock ring are made out of them!

Look. If I sign Cody Bellinger l will no longer be able to provide free ketchup & mustard at #Yankees Stadium. Charging you poors for condiments is a bridge I just won't cross. Yet.

You see, if MLB has a salary cap, then I can lock in more profits by charging #Yankees fans more each year, while I only have to spend a capped amount. This is great for me! After all I've done for you fans, you should be rooting for this! Bring on the lockout!