Sam Evans (@reallysamevans) 's Twitter Profile
Sam Evans

@reallysamevans

You can call me flower if you want to! Standup album “Sweet Baby Boy” music.apple.com/us/album/sweet…

ID: 531573997

calendar_today20-03-2012 19:38:33

4,4K Tweet

3,3K Followers

1,1K Following

Logan Guntzelman (@adirtyguntz) 's Twitter Profile Photo

honoring one of the biggest losses of the year while also trying to get my money’s worth out of this shrimp costume 🦐 😭

Mike Recine (@mikerecine) 's Twitter Profile Photo

One of the best parts of being a dad is when your family goes to bed early so you can beat off on the couch. I’m surprised that was never a Family Matters episode. Urkel barges through the door and Carl nuts all over himself and is like “Go home Steve…”

Chris Calogero (@realchriscal) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I mean it IS fucking wild that the only way a guy can stay out of jail is by running for President. If it was a John Candy movie in the 80s it would be incredible.

Noah Garfinkel (@noahgarfinkel) 's Twitter Profile Photo

A key point missing in a lot of post debate analysis is that Trump’s claim about immigrants eating pets almost perfectly syncs up to the piano in the Peanuts theme song.