Martin Luther, 1517:

Exclusive: The White House opposes a plan from Anthropic to expand access to its powerful artificial-intelligence model Mythos on.wsj.com/4cHiUY5

…aaaaaaand that ends the case

Robert E Lee on November 11, 1864

white people be like i have to pick up my dog’s Invisalign

can someone hang out w this girl

Breaking News: Spirit Airlines is preparing to shut down after failing to strike a deal for a financial lifeline from the Trump administration, two people familiar with the matter said. nyti.ms/4uk0KS5

So hungover I logged into my 401k and added beneficiaries

It's utterly ridiculous that we have all these supposed billionaire geniuses running around, and their greatest innovation of our lifetime has been stealing our personal data to sell us targeted ads.

thought my date was going well but at the end she booped me on the head with her box of leftovers and said “take care sport”

Airlines sending me "we're in this together" emails. When my suitcase was 52 pounds I was on my own.

Breaking News: Senate Republicans proposed $1 billion for security measures around President Trump’s ballroom project in an immigration bill. nyti.ms/3Rn0PWQ

Breaking News: Tennessee Republicans unveiled a new congressional map carving up the state's only majority-Black district, likely giving their party the ability to flip the state's lone remaining Democratic seat. nyti.ms/4waXNVK

god why does everything have to be so weird and stupid

I simply would not publish an article where I make clear I have no idea what a presidential library is

Separating the art from the artist and telling my 5yo daughter her watercolor painting sucks

Breaking News: The Virginia Supreme Court struck down Democrats’ redrawn House map, in a major victory for Republicans. nyti.ms/4dee17M

Evangelicals: "Catholics worship statues." Catholics: "No, we don't." Evangelicals: "Still, the Bible says don't make statues at all!" Evangelicals build a golden Trump statue. Catholics:

Martin Luther Kiffin