[High Performance Podcast] Santa: y'know how long it takes to make a list of every child in the world? And y'know what I do when I finish the list? Jake Humphrey: *nodding* deliver the presents Santa: *shaking his head* check it twice mate Jake: *grinning* fucking hell

As your constituent, I want to thank you Fleur Anderson MP for attending Age UK Campaigns Parliamentary Reception. It's great to see your interest in the #ActNowAgeBetter campaign & how you can support the health & wellbeing of older constituents in our community.

"During a company event at a Colplay concert I offered my head of HR a Murray Mint which she accepted. Whilst singing along to Yellow she accidentally swallowed the mint, and I was forced to perform the Heimlich maneuver just as the Jumbotron camera focused on us."

From a resident who lives near the Bell Hotel, Epping. (Taken from r/Essex)

Nigel Farage MP What does this have to do with the ECHR, you moron? These are English judges in an English court passing judgement based on English law. This just proves that your ECHR bullshit is a total red herring, you utter fraud.

Please post and re-post the hell out of this please! And listen to it. And be nice about it online if possible. Massive drive to show people that people care right now. Thank you!

This is the current best book joke

Saturday night football. ✨

Dominic Grieve totally owns Faraged

Fulham getting Sander Berge to push ticket sales for tomorrow’s Wolves game. Some tickets in Riverside Stand £105 adults; £80 young adults 18-21yo; £80 seniors 65+. Putney Restricted View 18-21yo £52. Players don’t set ticket prices. Club does, so get a board member or exec to

Couldn't agree more.

This will be massive on the Reform news channels today.

Important thread from Torsten Bell. Worth a read.

Brigitte Bardot’s death means there are now just three people mentioned in Billy Joel’s We Didn’t Start the Fire who are still alive.

Jon Sooel - You were a remainer when Cameron was PM, you were a brexiteer under Boris, you said it was shameful that Truss was still in the party but voted for her budget & now that the Tories are languishing in the polls you go to the party leading in the polls. #bbcqt

I've plotted the most expensive McDonald's burger and the least expensive MacBook over time. This analysis projects that the most expensive burger will be more expensive than the cheapest laptop as soon as 2081

An alternative view on Keir Starmer - different from the daily torrent of bile poured over his head. Worth 2 minutes of your time.

In London hireable Lime scooters top out at 12.5 mph. That means that if you rode one round the London marathon course at top speed, never braking or backing off, by the time Sawe had finished you'd be more than a mile behind him. Absolute madness - as someone pointed out!