You’re just jealous that your job never gave you 8 straight years of PTO b’jays

I’d absolutely choke that stupid ass midget pony for waking me up out of LSD fever dreams like this

One of us had a fucking stroke. Whomever wrote this, or me trying to read it.

It’s a shame people don’t read porno magazines anymore. When my grandpa died he left us a stack of gay porno mags and a lot of unanswered questions. That’s called a legacy.

would hate to be a winged creature flying into this room

Start naming your kids Gary again you weirdos. Enough with the gruff

The Colin Hanks monkey hybrid one is making me rage. I am nude and red and punching the air rn

If all graffiti was this instead of stupid ass words nobody but the person doing it understands? I’d be so into graffiti

When you’re at chilis and someone orders fajitas

If you’re a honky in my age bracket, you absolutely have listened to this driving while having a mental montage of your own life

How I look at my car after 450 beers

otter eating an abalone

💁‍♀️

Prayers to Charlie Kirk and for anyone that had to preface their prayers with “I don’t agree with him but” you also need prayer. Something is seriously wrong with the political discourse in this country.

I have hearted an astronomical amount of titties and buns in the past week to cleanse my TL of conspiracy theories and free speech nerds.

13yo me soon as my parents went to bed

Tremendous moxie and hog for a guy his size

This is hilarious; this pizza place closes in two minutes, and then this guy walks in. 😂😂 Sound up!

We are seeing words put together that no human eyes have ever seen and no human brain has ever contemplated