Very excited to be back here on Sunday!

I'm enjoying drawing more than comedy at the moment because everyone I know who does comedy seems to be doing way better than me but at least with drawing I know I'm defiantly the best.

When someone says to me 'don't talk to me before I've had my morning coffee' I usually don't talk to them after their morning coffee either.

If U Can't Dance/ Naked (double A side!) Denying Right Back At Ya

Did any gay man ever use the word 'reductive' or know what it means before Madonna told them to look it up?

I seem to be taking umbrage at the most innocuous remarks today. Try me.

This Sunday me and Reece McLaughlin are previewing our Edinburgh show at Vauxhall Comedy Club is now Big Belly Comedy at 2pm. An opportunity for both my Twitter fans to see my tweets read out in real life! See you there!

New piece: Portrait of Jess Glynne with Cheese Wotsits. Message me if you'd like to learn more about my creative process.

I hate people who have the name Jolene and act like it's not a thing.

Dropping my first single soon. It's a body positive rap anthem called 'Big Fat Bitch'.

My Saturday nights are just me dancing to Mabel with all the lights off pretending that I'm trying to get over a man who never even existed.

Me as soon as the lift doors close.

Me when someone taps me on grindr.

I just full on caressed a man's hand on the tube by mistake.

If I call you hun I'm referring to you as a member of a warlike Asiatic nomadic people who invaded and ravaged Europe in the 4th–5th centuries.

Is it wrong to have a one night stand just because you've washed your sheets and they're not quite dry yet?

When I type 'night' and auto correct changes it to 'Buhari' - when have I or will I ever use Buhari in a conversation? I don't even know what that is.

Can I have a bacon roll please someone

Update on my health: My tonsils are so enlarged that they have been described as 'kissing'.

I will never ever forgive Charli XCX for that beyond utter shite Wannabe cover. I don't understand why there isn't more anger about this.