Staff in the school where I was a headteacher did not congregate in the staff room with alcohol. Instead they went home exhausted, washed their clothes and experienced two emotions, a sense of duty and worry in case they had brought Covid home with them. How dare you!

HUGE NEWS: The BBC have told me that if I hit 100k followers this week, I can officially take over as BBC political editor. I can become the REAL Laura Kuenssberg. 😭😭😭 I'm so excited, I could pee myself! Please make this happen x

NEW: Marjorie Taylor Greene was just confronted by Jim Acosta outside the Capitol—he read her “Marshall law” text message that she claims to not “recall” sending. She interrupted him while he read it and told him, “Stop harassing me! I didn’t give you permission! Leave me alone!”

So republicans say forgiving student loan debt is “bribery” but are totally okay with tax breaks for billionaires and big business … smh

BREAKING: Biden’s Justice Department announces that it found a way around Trump’s pardon, slaps ex-Trump Campaign Chairman Paul Manafort with a massive $3 million fine for hiding the over 20 bank accounts he stashed in foreign tax havens. RT IF YOU THINK THAT THIS IS GREAT NEWS!

BREAKING: In a major loss for Justice Clarence Thomas and his wife Ginni, Congress advances a bill to implement a Supreme Court ethics code and strengthen rules requiring Justices to recuse themselves from cases when they have conflicts of interest. RT IF YOU SUPPORT THIS BILL!

🥩 4 companies control 85% of the beef market 🫘 4 companies control 80% of the soy market 🍝 3 companies control 78% of the pasta market 🥣 3 companies control 72% of the cereal market These companies hike prices with impunity—especially in uncertain times. We need competition.

BREAKING: The prime minister has explained that after agonising over whether or not to resign, he had to make the tough decision of rigging rules so that he does not have to resign x

Is it a bit odd, that a presenter is not allowed on the BBC due to perceived bias (anti-Tory), whereas the head of the BBC used to be deputy chairman of the Hammersmith and Fulham Conservative party and the Chairman of the BBC has donated more than £400,000 to the Tories?

I don’t think Johnson started out as a fascist. But his uselessness and his desperation are combining to drive him in that direction. That these Tory MPs just watch on is bizarre. And dangerous.

@BBCLauraKT Also: Boris Johnson announces new flag design for the UK which encapsulates the growing popularity among himself of dictatorial governance.

BREAKING: North Korea just held a 4 day party which cost a billion in which celebs cheered a massive hologram of Kim Jong Un & everyone forced smiles & pretended to love him while N. Korean children went without food & necessities. So glad I live in a normal country like the UK x

I’m still blocked by Andrea Leadsom, and still no wiser about why that might be.

BREAKING: After telling Universal Credit claimants they can now apply for mortgages, Boris Johnson has announced some more exciting initiatives. For example, homeless people will be offered 10% off their next yacht & Russians will be allowed to buy 2 Tory MPs for the price of 1 x

BREAKING: Priti Patel is absolutely livid that lawyers are stopping her from breaking the law by arguing in court that the judge should apply the law x

There are people in this country who are angrier that Emma Thompson said something about Rwanda than they are about the fact we may be about to illegally separate refugees from their siblings to send them to camps there. 🇬🇧 is increasingly unrecognisable as a civilised society.

Got it! Thank you.

Word of the day is a reminder of 'trumperiness' (19th century): the state of being extremely showy, yet utterly worthless.

BREAKING: The entire senior leadership of the Church of England (every bishop in the House of Lords) has joined to decry the Rwanda scheme as "an immoral policy that shames Britain" in letter to @TheTimes thetimes.co.uk/article/immora…

BREAKING: Seven of Boris Johnson's former mistresses are currently standing outside Downing Street, demanding to know why they weren't offered £100k jobs too x