love to be told I need to fix my sleep schedule bc I stay up way too late like sure babe!!! I’ll also stop being depressed thank you so much for that insight

I’ve thought about it a lot and have done a little research and now I’m wondering if maybe there’s more than one worm in there

I do hope the new Office iteration casts a bunch of unknowns like the original

i can’t wait until i’m 33 next month and 24 year olds can be like “she looks soo good for her age can you believe her skin isn’t flapping off her decaying corpse yet? i can’t believe she still uses her phone tho god i hope i’m not still using my phone at that age”

Imagine making this self-assessment under oath and still being like yeah I should be President. goofball alert!!!!! 🤪🤪

Uh yeah I know a thing or two about perseverance. for example I’ve never been successful popping a zit that clearly isn’t ready, and yet

They should invent a sewing that doesn’t make you a hunchback

America is doing great actually. I don’t want any other countries to worry about us. We are fine

Okay, running mate reveal.

I don’t care what they do anymore as long as they start buying pilots and green lighting seasons!!!! Make tv please

kind of incredible actually just how much tech guys really don’t understand at all the value of the arts as a tactile form of creating. They should be studied in a lab

How do I get on the Reba multi-cam! Is anyone reading for it! Not having reps is getting old!

i don’t mind if you’re thriving just don’t do it in front of me

I’ve been seeing a resurgence of comp teams using It’s All Coming Back To Me Now for group lyrical so I just want to put it out there that a running joke in my dance comp feature set in 2000 is a group dance set to It’s All Coming Back To Me Now. Specificity in comedy baby!!!

since the weather apps have all lost their touch I’m going back to doing things the old fashioned way: standing on my balcony with my hands on my hips until I see a bug

For months, Netanyahu made his intent to invade Rafah clear, yet the majority of my colleagues and President Biden sent more weapons to enable the massacre.

My statement on the Israeli apartheid regime's ground invasion of Rafah:

This. Just chat prompts have the energy requirements of a small country and OpenAI has admitted that they cannot continue to operate in the long term without some kind of technological breakthrough in fusion energy.

Surprisingly generative AI is ecologically worse than crypto.

I love when you apply to a job on LinkedIn and afterwards they send you an email like ‘Your application was sent to Gorkles! Now take these steps for more success: follow the company to stay updated! Then beg! Beg so hard. Get down on your knees and grovel you little bitch’